Is An Open Adoption The Best Idea?
Coming to the decision of placing baby for adoption is not something that can be taken lightly. You will be relinquishing your rights to parent the child and have control over how they are raised. However, there is always the option to go for an open adoption. An open adoption can mean different things according to the guidelines set forth by the adoption agency, but most of the time, this means that you will have some contact with the adoptive parents and possibly short visits or interactions with the child at certain times. An open adoption can sound ideal to many considering adoption as an option. Yet, this is not something that is a good idea for every birth parent.
Are you emotionally okay with only seeing the child on the adoptive parents' terms?
Even though you will likely be granted occasional access to the child, whether it is in physical meetings or other means, such as pictures and communication, the adoptive parents can choose to stop these interactions at any time. You must be completely understanding that even though there is a degree of openness, in the end, the adoptive parents will be left to make the decisions.
Are you capable of being a constant in the child's life?
One of the reasons birth parents make the decision to place their baby for adoption is because their life is not where it needs to be or not stable enough to raise a child. These same problems can get in the way with an open adoption. The adoptive parents will not want you to only be present when it is convenient for you or going in and out of your child's life because this behavior will make it too difficult for the child.
Are you okay with your child knowing that you allowed the adoption?
Placing a bay for adoption can cary a certain level of guilt for some parents, and they must deal with this in their own way. However, with an open adoption, the child will know that you were the biurth parent and chose to allow someone to raise them. Unlike a closed adoption in which the birth parent does not have to openly aknowledge teh situation before the child; open adoption will likely require it. This idea is one thing that some birth parents have an especially difficult time with, so in these cases, an open adoption is not always the best decision.